Thursday, May 5, 2011

The Challenge: Let God be God

Psalm 139:23-24
Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.  See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.

This is the last week of our Jonah Bible study at church.  It has challenged me to let God be God in every situation.  In the homework I did today three questions were asked:

1       Are you becoming aware of a deal you have made with God?
2       Are you seeking/hoping to control or manipulate God in any way?
  Are you disappointed with God about an outcome He 
      has allowed?

(questions from "Jonah:  Navigating a Life Interrupted" by Priscilla Shirer, pg. 133)

At first, my thought is I am not aware of a deal I have made with God.  I am not trying to manipulate Him in any way, but then I thought about my journal.  Maybe in the deep corners of my heart, I thought if I surrendered completely God would respond in a certain way.  Will I ever learn to quit trying to figure out how He will act?
Our family came to Arizona in 1999, and God made it extremely clear that was the path we were to take.   My husband and I decided we would move when our house sold.  Then a friend challenged us by asking if we were basing our obedience to God on our house selling.  We recognized then we just needed to set a date and plan towards it. 

My thought was since we were moving forward, God would sell our house and provide employment for Jerry in Arizona.  Instead we were in an apartment for 11 months, and the Jerry's office in North Carolina flew him back and forth for six months until he was able to get a job here.

In retrospect, I wouldn’t have it any other way.  We learned to trust God.  He provided for our needs, and we made some connections with people in the apartment complex we are still close to today.  I have very fond memories of that season of our lives.  

Today I am reminding myself that God knows best.  He sees the bigger picture.
 Today, I surrender, Lord, that part of my heart that expects you to intervene in my life in a certain way.  You have proven yourself faithful, and I trust you to do what is best for me today just as you did in the past. 

Forgive me for putting you in a box.  Your ways are higher than mine, and in the end, I love your ways best.  Thank you for not doing things my way but yours.  Amen.

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